Spicy Pineapple Salsa

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When I’m in a hurry to get something — anything —  in my belly, I grab some cooked protein (e.g. Slow Cooker Kalua Pig) and top it with a potent flavor booster, like spicy pineapple salsa. This sweet, crunchy, spicy, sour, and juicy condiment elevates everything you spoon it on. Plus, it keeps for a few days in the fridge. Emergency flavor booster + emergency protein = happy mommy.

Here’s what to gather to make 2 cups:

  • 1½ cups (340 grams) diced pineapple 
  • 1 Persian cucumber, peeled, diced and seeds removed 
  • 1 jalapeño pepper, diced (remove ribs and seeds if you can’t stand the heat)
  • ¼ cup diced red onion
  • ¼ cup minced cilantro
  • 2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
  • Juice from 1 lime
  • Kosher salt
  • Freshly ground black pepper

Here’s how to make it:

Combine everything in a bowl and season to taste with salt and pepper.

That’s it.

What? You want to see the step-by-step photos and play-by-play color commentary? Then keep reading after the jump…

You can start with a fresh pineapple…

…but I don’t have time or the patience to carve out the “eyes” and chop it up.

If you wanna do it, feel free to knock yourself out.

Since I’m lazy, I normally pick up a package of cubed pineapple at Trader Joe’s or my neighborhood grocery store.

You still have some chopping to do, but it’s much less work.

Next, grab a Persian cucumber — a mini seedless cucumbers that you can find at most grocery stores. You can substitute half an English cucumber or a regular cucumber because you’re peeling it and removing the middle.

Even though Persian cukes are seedless, I scoop out the soft center before dicing it, so the salsa doesn’t get too water-logged.

To spice up the salsa, I add a diced jalapeño pepper. You can vary the heat by removing the seeds and ribs (mild) or replacing it with a habanero pepper (sweat-producing spicy). 

If you’re making a kid-friendly salsa, whack off the stem…

…and cut around the seeds and ribs….

…before dicing it up.

Grab a red onion and dice up a quarter of it. 

If you add too much, the onion flavor will be overwhelming. Your breath will make your spouse and kids cry, which is fun for only a few minutes.

Lastly, chop up the cilantro…

…and mix everything together in a medium sized bowl.

Always season to taste with salt and pepper.

Pretty easy, huh?