January’s over, and so is your Whole30®. Congratulations!

But what now?

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It’s Day 30! But before we sprint across the finish line, I have one more recipe to highlight.

This weekend, I’m off to New York to attend my cousin Jennifer’s baby shower. Henry and the kids will man the fort while I’m gone, but they won’t be left to fend entirely for themselves: I’m leaving them a big pot of Oven-Braised Mexican Beef. 

Wrapped in lettuce leaves and topped with homemade guacamole, this spicy, hearty take on chili con carne should keep my family’s bellies full while they cheer on the Niners this Super Bowl Sunday.

Follow the jump for the recipe and some announcements!

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I rarely have time to make a big production out of my meals. Between work and parenting (and blogging and app development and — shh! — a new secret project), my cup runneth over. I’m not about to make a special weeknight trip to the market to hunt down some exotic ingredients for a complicated new recipe I found in a cookbook.

Instead, when pressed for time (which is just about always), I rummage through my pantry and fridge and MacGyver something together. And that usually involves some handy-dandy Emergency Protein™. (Who says I can’t trademark that?)

There are plenty of ways to quickly cook up a batch of Emergency Protein. My iPad cookbook app shows off a method for slow-roasting meats in an oven, and you can always just throw a steak on the grill or water oven. Leftovers can form the basis of a super-simple Emergency Protein meal, too. For example, on Saturday night, Henry reheated some leftover Slow Cooker Kalua Pig, paired it with a variation on Cauliflower Fried “Rice,” and voila! Dinner was on the table in minutes.

All out of leftovers? If you have a Defrost Bowl™ in your refrigerator, this shouldn’t post a problem at all. (What? You got a problem with me trademarking that, too?)

Over the years, I’ve gotten lots of questions about my Defrost Bowl, but there’s really nothing all that magical about it. It’s just a big bowl in my fridge that I use to thaw a bunch of frozen meat. (Note: It’s a bowl — not a colander. I certainly don’t want to clean up the bloody goo that inevitably oozes out of my packages of meat.) Every few days, I transfer some frozen protein from my freezer to my trusty Defrost Bowl; then, when it’s time to get cooking, I grab whatever Emergency Protein is no longer icy, and then decide on a cooking method.

My Defrost Bowl serves another purpose, too: It forces me to cook my meat before it spoils, and keeps me from stuffing my face with take-out. Win-win!

One of my all-time favorite ways to whip up supper in a flash using Emergency Protein is to make a Garbage Stir-Fry™. (Yes, I’m trademarking EVERYTHING. That’s my secret project.)

Keep reading, and I’ll show you how to make a fragrant and zesty Garbage Stir-Fry with ground meat, curry, and cabbage. Don’t worry about the name – I call it Garbage Stir-Fry, but once you taste it, you won’t want to throw any of it away.

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A confession: I’m not much of a football fan. But this year, I vow to pay closer attention to the Super Bowl — mostly ‘cause the Niners are in it.

I was a kid during the San Francisco 49ers’ heyday in the 1980s, and watched football on TV every Sunday (and Monday night) with my dad and my grandpa. We’d cheer on Joe Montana (who lived nearby) as he lofted perfect spirals to Dwight Clark, Roger Craig, Jerry Rice. Our family rooted for the home team in each of their five Super Bowl victories — and why not? I mean, who could possibly root against players who recorded songs like this?

(I’ll admit it: I bought the cassingle of this song at the supermarket. But I wasn’t the only one, as evidenced by the fact that Henry started serenading aurally assaulting me with this song yesterday. HE STILL REMEMBERS ALL THE LYRICS.)

These days, football’s not exactly top-of-mind. I have a hard time distinguishing between Jim and John Harbaugh, and Ray Lewis’s dancing skills are more interesting to me than his linebacking skills. Henry’s forever rolling his eyes at my lack of pigskin knowledge. Sue me: I don’t know (or care) what a pistol formation is, or when it makes sense to attempt an onside kick. If you start jabbering about a “pick-6,” I’ll assume you’re referring to lottery tickets.

But without fail, at the end of every January:

• I read up on the human-interest stories about the players’ personal lives (because SOMEONE has to care that Colin Kaepernick likes to Instagram his food before he eats it);
• I enter the Super Bowl office hospital pool (which I’ve actually won a couple of times, thankyouverymuch); and
• If I’m not scheduled to be at work, I plan and host a Super Bowl party.

During the shindig, I typically keep an eye on the score, and occasionally ask questions that expose my ignorance of the game. But mostly, I’ll chat with friends, pick apart the million-dollar commercials and the halftime show extravaganza, and eat.

You see, football is only a small part of the equation for me. I’m really there to kick back with a bowl of (Paleo) chips, some sliders, and a whole mess ‘o chicken wings.

Specifically: Chile Lime Chicken Wings.

This recipe’s new to this blog, so keep reading for the details!

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Do you have the menu for your Super Bowl party planned yet? It’s only a week away, people. Don’t be caught unprepared, or you’ll find yourself elbow-deep in buckets of sickly-sweet buffalo wings and face-planting into gigantic bowls of Cheetos.

But with a bit of time and a handful of real, whole ingredients, you can make a delicious assortment of —

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It’s Day 26, and I bet you’re as sick of cooking as I am. I understand how you feel; I’ve been cooking — AND BLOGGING! — every night for over three weeks, and quite frankly, I’m ready to keel over. Sadly, kvetching ain’t gonna put food in our bellies. But who says we can’t throw together a dead-simple meal and spend the rest of the day sprawled out on the couch? (Err…I mean, sprawled out on the grass like Mark Sisson. Outside. Synthesizing vitamin D. Barefoot. In the freezing cold.)

Let’s make Slow Cooker Cheater Pork Stew!

The secret to this easy meal is to just dump a bunch of umami-laden ingredients into your slow cooker, including marinara sauce out of a jar. Sandra Lee calls this “semi-homemade” cooking in an attempt to make it sound respectable, but let’s call a spade a spade: This is a cheater’s recipe. But who cares? It’s Whole30-compliant, requires minimal prep time, and explodes with flavor.

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To Cambodians, it’s abóbora. Koreans call it danhobak. In Thailand, it’s fak thong, while Aussies and Kiwis refer to it as Japanese squash. And in Japan, it’s known as kabocha.

Personally, I don’t care what you call this squat, mottled green, winter squash — just make sure you save me some because it’s my favorite kind.

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I love my sister, she’s the best / She’s cooler than any other girl that I have ever met. -Juliana Hatfield

I grew up sharing a teeny-tiny bedroom with my big sister Fiona. With two-and-a-half years separating us, we had little in common other than our cramped living quarters and our high-pitched voices. I bugged her to play “library” and “shoe store”; she preferred to hunker down with a Stephen King novel. I wanted to watch “Ripley’s Believe It Or Not”; Fiona insisted on changing the channel to catch reruns of ALF. I wrote scathingly mean things about her in my journal; she read all my secrets and left me gloating, accusatory notes IN MY OWN DIARY that made me cry.

Not surprisingly, we fought like cats and dogs. Actually, worse: Like sisters.

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My friend Jackie (the founder/creator of Lunchbots) has a saying: “The healthiest lunch is the one you pack for yourself.” And she’s absolutely right: By making your own food, you can be sure of every single ingredient you stick in your lunchbox.

This is particularly important when you’re on a Whole30. There’s nothing worse than being three-plus weeks into your month of super-clean eats — only to discover that the plate of chicken and vegetables that you ate at the company cafeteria was marinated in sugar and dusted with flour. 

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“It was a beautiful Belgian day. The smell of waffles and Brussels sprouts filled the summer air…” - Dr. Evil

As the name suggests, Brussels sprouts hail from Belgium, where these tender buds were cultivated as far back as the 13th century. But sadly, they’re nowhere near as popular as Belgian waffles. A lot of folks just aren’t keen on the mildly bitter bite of these miniature cabbages.

Obviously, they haven’t tried Brussels sprouts that have been roasted with bacon and drizzled with aged balsamic vinegar. The pork and vinegar mellow the bittersweetness of the Brussels sprouts; on a chilly winter night, this hearty dish makes the perfect side.

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